i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
I wish you were here to vomit in your hand.
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
Rolled in at 3:30am from the strip club, with all the screaming I did, Siri doesn't even recognize my voice this morning,
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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