I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
The dentist just called my mother to confirm the appointment that I made on his answering machine at 4:33 am this morning..
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
Dude, jerking off when you're all hopped up on pre workout energy supplements has got to be the greatest thing I've ever done.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
Was banging my ex last night when his roommate walked in... We kept going. #goaheadandwatch
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
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