so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
I got fingered by sexual harassment panda last night, by a van, I can't remember if he took off his furry panda hands...
you can't exactly throw up or pass out at the pentagon so i had to pull my shit together
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
I broke up with him in the bar & then asked him if he wanted to have a contest to see who gets the most numbers. I say I took that break up well
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
Randomize
