Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
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