I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
he proceeded to punch 3 mailboxes in a row and when i asked him why, he said "because they were talking shit"... i need a new boyfriend. and a new life.
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
so he just called his new girlfriend by my name and she was too drunk to even notice how awkward..
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
MASS TEXT: Next weekend I will be in town for St. Patty's day. There will be a bonfire and liqour olympics. We will have booze but in order to participate it is byob. Upon arrival everyone will be asked to sign a waiver. I am not responsible for liver failure, death, loss of clothing or memory, bites, scratches, hickies, pregnancies, or any other for of injury you may obtain while participating. There will be ridiculous amounts of green glitter, be prepared to puke it up. ALSO WEAR SOMETHING GREEN OR YOU WILL BE PENALIZED!! AUTOMATIC 5 SHOTS. HAPPY GAMING!!!
Randomize
