My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
Randomize
