okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
She accidentally pre-ordered us Dominos for the next day at 11:30am... we were very confused when we woke up.
I think misery doesn't even think of me as company anymore. I'm an unofficial roommate.
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
Do you know how hard it is to be while you're high with a chuck Norris poster in the bathroom?
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
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