i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
The only birthday messages I got from men were from my 8th grade boyfriend and the bouncer at our bar. I think I'm doing something wrong in life.
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
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