I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
What do I do when my mom and I both awkwardly spot the Rocky Horror parody porn sitting on the coffee table? Leave it or try to move it?
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
