They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
I woke up at 2 in my clothes with a defrosted steak in my pocket, no drinky this week at all.
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
I don't really feel bad about it, but I legit just squirted in the back of an Uber and it makes me think how many times has this happened before?!?!
Lexi was drunk enough at 2pm to say "fuck tom brady and fuck you too" to literally every person at the store in Pats attire.
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
Randomize
