a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
I just washed champagne and tuna off my body. I feel like that was a successful shower.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
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