and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
Wanna tell me why vodka seeped out of the memory foam when I climbed into my bed?
Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
I went on a psycho cleaning spree so I feel I've earned the right to spend the day in bed watching porn and eating sausage biscuits. If you bring alcohol you can join me.
All other girlfriends are inferior. You are the chosen one.
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
I need to wake up with a beard between my thighs more often, I'm a fucking saint.
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
