Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
Weird shit dude, I just realized that the girl I fucked last night looks like Shaun White's twin sister. I dunno if I should be scared or turned on
I hope her Double McTwist was as good as his
Then we managed to set a grill and all 24lbs of meat on it on fire. I didn't help because I was filled with alcohol and extra flammable.
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
Girl just walked into the bar with a T-shirt that says "I'm not Irish, kiss me anyways." Target aquired.
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
It's like that thing with the devil and the angel except one shoulder has orgasms and the other has stuffed crust pizza and depression.
Currently at a bar observing the mating patterns of drunken people in their 60s. This is hilariously terrifying. Hope he has Viagra.
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
Randomize
