Im mastering the way to pass gas silently.
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
So squirting runs in the family.
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
So hungover. Have a black eye from where I tried to brush my teeth and stabbed myself in the eye instead. Should make the performance review I was stress drinking about go so much better.
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Randomize
