party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
i would really appreciate it if you would stop texting my girlfriend.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop cock blocking me.
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
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Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
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We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
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