how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
This shit I'm taking feels like I've eaten every burrito in the world and chased that with an aquarium of hot sauce.
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
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