Girls are like M&M's, once the lights go out you can't tell the difference.
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
Someone played tic tac toe on my abs?
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
Is it bad that I coached my cousins 6 year old boy to steal a 30 rack of keystone out of an unattended cooler at our family reunion, or was I just giving him a social head start in high school? I err on the side of awesome.
The only person more miserably hungover from the party is the dog, and that's because he ate some balloons
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
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