he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
Hahah what did you even say to him?!
That I was gonna inflate his vagina with a leaf blower?
Oh.
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
Randomize
