Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
only in a texas roadhouse would someone whistle while I was breastfeeding.
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
Randomize