I like complaining with weaving words and complex sentences. It makes me seem more sophisticated and less bitchy.
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
Apparently my downstairs neighbors don't much appreciate it when I do drunk aerobics at 3am on a Wednesday...
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
He made a toga out of my hot pink bed sheets and cracked an egg on his head. Then he proceeded to alphabetize our DVD collection, which was impressive because I'm 99% sure he couldn't have done that sober.
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
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