I'm calling you out on twitter if you don't come over right now.
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
I just wished the taco bell drive thru guy a happy cinco de mayo. Who says arizonians hate mexicans?
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
I woke up surrounded by goldfish. Thank God my laptop was here too. Now I don't have to leave my bed all day.
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
Randomize
