It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
Fuck you. Fuck this party. I just wanted to be pretty with a cute little tiara and boys sucking my tits, now i have a hangman game drawn on my face and jello shots in my hair.
I wanted to give you a great birthday party. You know I did.
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
I did not marry a roomba.
Randomize