This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
My butt just had a miscarriage. It was yours. I'm sorry. You would have been a great sexually confused parent.
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
I feel like I have African malaria. I just remembered singing Teenage Dream in full to that biker couple at the bar.
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
Just called my dad drunk from bed to ask for bacon.. my niece texted me when it was ready.. i'm never moving out
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
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