I just realized that my mother and I have the same favorite sex position, Guess which one!
OMG! Ew.
Lucky Dad.
I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
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