He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
Just had sex with a girl from Italy. The only english she knew was Obama campaign slogans. Her screaming, "Yes we can!" as I was railing her not only turned me on but allowed my neighbors to know it was consentual.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
....I feel like you are deciding whether or not I'm good enough for you based on what I ordered from Chipotle.
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
She grabbed a $20 bill out of my hand, calling it a lap dance coupon and then she dragged me into her bedroom. I think I’m in love
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