i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
He was sucking on my finger.... and it was at that moment that I thought: Man. I wish I had a penis.
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
I've lost all respect for marriage since I joined this bachelor party.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
Randomize
