He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
The moment you ate chicken nuggets out of your purse you were my hero.
Where the hell did i get chicken nuggets from
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
Did you really lure me out of the bar with a blond holding a dunkin donuts bag? Well played sir, well played.
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
I just want to make out with him forever
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
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