He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
When I planned out my evening, "co-author lesbian vampire erotica" was not anywhere on my list of expected activities.
Me neither, but hey, this is where we've ended up. Let's embrace the moment.
Randomize
