he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
jacking off on stolen wireless... gotta enjoy the small things in life
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like running into your ex boyfriend at the liquor store at 3 in the afternoon.
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