who the fuck tagged pancake nipples on my profile picture?
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
This beer is not sobering me up at all
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
Can I come take down that wallpaper yet? I stopped seeing that dude and I need to occupy my time with something besides getting drunk at bingo night and cussing out old people. Also, i'm not sure on the legal stipulations but I might have, unintentionally, committed grand theft auto at some point.
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
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