a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
All I wanna do is sit in water and get drunk. The only thing more American is giving birth to eagles.
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
Guy hitting on me at bar is guy who's Craigslist ad we laughed at the other night. Not even kidding.
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
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