What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
Apparently I was pointing at birds and yelling "YOU USED TO BE A DINOSAUR!!!"
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
So in hindsight, going through the McDonald's drive thru plastered at 4 a.m. on stolen bikes was a bad idea.
Randomize
