This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
I just miserably failed my own drug test. At least I know what a positive will look like when I give them to the employees tomorrow.
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
No, this time she was diabetic. I think I fucked her into diabetic shock.
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
I won't apologize to a one balled man
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
You're a hot mess, you know that?
At least I'm a FUN hot mess. Like a train crash full of pizza, fireworks and glitter.
Enjoy your early 30’s! You’re still young enough to catch a twenty something that can fuck 4 times a day, hot enough to date forty year old penises that can last long enough to give you multiple orgasms
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