Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
My mother walked into the bathroom at 345 am while I was splashing in the bathtub with the remnants of her birthday cake all over me... she looked at me and walked out...
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
Do you think it would be weird to wear a shirt that says 'big fun small package' from an ex for a first date?
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
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