I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
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