I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
My wife googled 'purchase vibrator.' Not sure if I should be excited or offended.
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
i got to hold a baby today and i loved it and i want a baby but actually i'm going to make an appointment to get birth control now.
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
I already plan to donate my brain to science so they can attempt to fully understand the complexities of my existence
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
Randomize
