What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
Interesting occurrence: the application I use to keep track of my periods and sexual encounters just notified me it had been over 4 months since you were logged as an active partner and ask if I'd like to remove you from my options. Wow, kmsl.
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
just had a woman ask me to donate my eggs so that her baby could look like me. don't know whether to get a restraining order or be flattered. thoughts?
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
Randomize
