I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
Dude.. I don’t care how hairy she is, you already left me at the bar, and now I have to find another fucking way home... NOW BE A MAN ABOUT IT!
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
some girl just asked me how to spell unconscious. I really want to know what she was texting.
if i die of alcohol poisoning tonight, just know i kinda expected it and totally deserved it
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
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