When i light up a cigarette people look at of like i'm going to pee on their children.
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
She tied me up with her honor cords...
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
I told them I got hit by a car again and now im pretty sure they think im being abused but there was no way in hell the truth was going to fly. Employed people aren't supposed to break their faces in piggy back ride accidents.
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
I blew past the Governor's motorcade going twice the speed limit and DIDN'T get a ticket. God wants me to get laid.
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
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