hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
My Easter Basket from my parents consisted of one chocolate bunny and a massive amount of condoms and a single note saying "the pope approves of the use of condoms" love mom and dad
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
Randomize
