Texts From Last Night

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  (818): View more from California

  Hi Jason, it's Liz. We dont need you to pick us up anymore. I dont care if you will be here in a milisecond. And you should know im wearing really amazing shoes.

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  (818): Hi Jason, it's Liz. We dont need you to pick us up anymore. I dont care if you will be here in a milisecond. And you should know im wearing really amazing shoes. http://tfl.nu/a910
  Replies (9) Good night (698) Bad night (841)
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  (509): View more from Washington

  i just caught my roommate coming out of the bathroom half naked with a surge protector. he told me he didn't wanna talk about it.

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  (509): i just caught my roommate coming out of the bathroom half naked with a surge protector. he told me he didn't wanna talk about it. http://tfl.nu/yjzk
  Replies (12) Good night (1092) Bad night (2774)
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  (605): View more from South Dakota

  I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other

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  (605): I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other http://tfl.nu/boea
  Replies (24) Good night (5594) Bad night (1601)
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  (551): View more from New Jersey

  Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK

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  (551): Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK http://tfl.nu/f4xz
  Replies (6) Good night (3692) Bad night (942)
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  (315): View more from New York

  i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?

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  (315): i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now? http://tfl.nu/2nou
  Replies (16) Good night (3858) Bad night (1111)
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  (719): View more from Colorado

  No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.

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  (719): No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor. http://tfl.nu/gx10
  Replies (7) Good night (949) Bad night (6405)
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  (972): View more from Texas

  He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.

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  (972): He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom. http://tfl.nu/ko2r
  Replies (8) Good night (843) Bad night (3496)
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  (586): View more from Michigan

  My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.

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  (586): My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas. http://tfl.nu/bset
  Replies (8) Good night (739) Bad night (2467)
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  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN

  (1-412): View more from Pennsylvania

  how did i know this would happen?

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  (412): I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN (1-412): how did i know this would happen? http://tfl.nu/2nli
  Replies (8) Good night (1903) Bad night (1212)
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  (925): View more from California

  I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.

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  (925): I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place. http://tfl.nu/fozt
  Replies (10) Good night (1334) Bad night (629)
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  (419): View more from Ohio

  I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.

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  (419): I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation. http://tfl.nu/t73g
  Replies (2) Good night (909) Bad night (697)
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  (972): View more from Texas

  I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.

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  (972): I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break. http://tfl.nu/fgur
  Replies (13) Good night (1924) Bad night (467)
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  (702): View more from Nevada

  Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?

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  (702): Would I waste your time for mediocre porn? http://tfl.nu/88ga
  Replies (2) Good night (579) Bad night (220)
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  (859): View more from Kentucky

  Don't be too mad at the guy who broke your kitchen table. Didn't get his name, but he knew all about your gay porn career. Like DETAILS...

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  (859): Don't be too mad at the guy who broke your kitchen table. Didn't get his name, but he knew all about your gay porn career. Like DETAILS... http://tfl.nu/5739
  Replies (8) Good night (930) Bad night (335)
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  (623): View more from Arizona

  It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day.

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  (623): It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day. http://tfl.nu/ue2e
  Replies (1) Good night (229) Bad night (420)

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