awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
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