she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
It was insane. I was drunk for 11 consecutive hours. I woke up covered in almonds and there were footprints all over my shirt
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
Woke up at noon, still drunk, naked, with another girl next to me. When she wakes up, I'm gonna have my SECOND lesbian experience with her. How's your 2015 going?
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
Randomize
