BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
Doctor took one look at my penis and said, 'you don't have herpes, you just masturbate too much'
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
I'm laying in bed cuddling with my teddy bear and eating waffles. I need a fucking boyfriend
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