Remember that time I came into your room after taking a muscle relaxant and we argued about what state has the longest coastline?
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
Why is there bacon in the couch?
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
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