Well douche your snatch and let's go!
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
I want her autograph on my taint
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
Randomize
