so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
I wish life had little blips of pornography
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
When you wake up with a bow tie and mustache drawn on your penis, you know you had a good night.
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
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