PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
dude, that chick is coming to see me and stay for 2 nights. I'm hitting the 3rd in the trifecta of friends.
You're one hell of a depraved bastard dude, I'm borderline speechless. You officially win.
They all have matching tattoos so they're all official bffs. I love my life.
i think i have two assholes
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
Randomize
