that thing about your dad's boner was meant to be a compliment
walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
Disregard everything I texted you last night. Oh, and disregard me hooking up with your boyfriend.
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Randomize
