i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
I'm going to get drunk on champagne by myself.
Oh no wait my cat's here. Thank god for a second there I sounded really sad.
there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
highlight from tonight: i hit on her and her mother.
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Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
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Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
if a CSI technician examined our hotel room with a black light he'd think we hit the Pulse button a DNA blender without a lid
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave