Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
Ran into that hot funeral director in the bar two days after the wake. pretty sure we drunk made out.
Grandpa would have been proud
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
BEST FEELING EVER: Standing in a hot fucking shower, while super baked, while eating a cookie.
You eat cookies in the shower?
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
Randomize