hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
If Curt Schilling could pitch a game with that blood-filled sock... if Tiger Woods won the 2008 US Open with a torn ligament, then I'd be an embarrassment to the human race if I couldn't manage to at least jerk him off even if I was still crying after he put it in my butt.
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
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